April Fools Day (And Halloween) Must Be Early This Year

Reality to Earth . . . Did I just hear you right? You're bringing back WHAT?

I know things are going badly over at NBC (The president of entertainment at the network as much as said so to reporters on Friday), but when you hear something like this one brainstorm you wonder if somebody's leg was being pulled right out of its socket in the meeting during which this idea came up.

Then you do a little research and realize they're taking it seriously and seem to be suggesting  you might want to do so as well. The NBC network is reaching back into television's spoof-laden past to come up with . . . Drumroll please . . . A "visually spectacular reinvention" of "The Munsters" as an hour long drama. (I believe, given the fact it's being woven together by Brian Fuller (!), the same character who worked on the late, lamented "Pushing Daisies", and Bryan Singer (!!), who led the X-Men onto the screen, a dramedy with a bit of action is a more likely outcome.)

That's "The Munsters", folks. If you have any connection to a place where syndicated TV shows filled part of your childhood, you probably remember them. The show had two singularly goofy seasons on CBS in the 60's, along with a few movies and telemovies, and a late 80's syndicated reboot to its name. This came with the aid of a rather genial group of actors in classic movie monster make-up, interacting blithely with the 'normal' societies they were wrapped up in.

Sometimes lately I watch television with the same fascination some people watch auto races; to see when things go spectacularly wrong. NBC as of late qualifies as an auto race in which the track is littered with wreckage while some of the pit teams seem to have been diverting ideas from the main grid and saving the entertaining stuff for USA Network, where the short-season programming and the odd fun concepts NBCUniversal are generating seem to be doing a hell of a lot better than what's being splashed out onto the senior circuit. Perhaps they should be getting this one instead of the network, or it should be sent to one of their other wings, SyFy, as it would be the only way to assure the show would last long enough into the slash-and-burn festival NBC calls a television season to find out what they've gotten themselves into.

Are the networks running out of ideas? It's a good question without a definitive answer, but "Grandpa" Al Lewis standing down in his dungeon and mixing various potions might never have reached for an ingredient like this to throw into the mix. In any event, stay tuned ladies and gentlemen. Whether it makes sense or not, it's happening. I only shudder to think what's next.

Oprahpalooza

Reality to Earth . . . If a talk show falls in the forest and everyone's around to hear it, does it mean it was more than a talk show?

The Oprah "I'll See You 'til I See You" World Tour comes to an end this week, ladies and gentlemen, leaving a one hour scheduling abyss in syndicated markets across the country* and at least three other talk show spinoffs in its wake . . . Along with a roar of trumpets which would have make the blast which took down Jericho's walls sound like a jazz quartet's last set at 3 AM.

Hyped much? The final shows, no matter what happens during them, couldn't possibly live up to the over one year roll-up which preceded them, even if they needed Chicago's United Center to film two of the three. Being sort of an aficionado of the art of television last calls**, I find myself curious at what's going to be going on in this final week, but I don't expect life to stop on this somewhat busy little sphere because one host decided to move on with her life.

If we got over Johnny Carson retiring in favor of Jay Leno, America, we'll get through this.

Don't get me wrong. A lot of interesting television went on in the 25 years Oprah Winfrey held court in her studio (And beside that, it wouldn't be smart for any writer to gnash teeth at someone who A. Puts literacy high on her list of priorities and B. You'd probably consider choosing from a selected list of felonies to do work for), but it's a bit much. Especially when you consider that when the fallout settles from this telenuke, I expect we'll see the lady coming back to the airwaves in some way, shape or form.

I preach patience Oprah fans, for Oprah II is out there somewhere in your future. The truly creative never completely leave the stage, they just recharge their batteries and find new ways to dazzle you the next time they pop-up . . . Especially those creative people with a brand-spanking new cable network at their disposal.


*New York's Channel 7 seems to just be shaking its head and filling the space with an extra hour of news. Normally I'd pan them for their lack of creativity, but as their network, in the past month, ash-canned two hours of daytime soap programming (Both of which have been automatic programming plug-ins for over forty years apiece!) in favor of a new cooking show and a new reality show, they get a pass to grab a mop and bucket and clean up in the aftermath.

**Someday, if the silly season in this country slackens for a few days, I might walk you through a tour of a few personal favorite, or somewhat infamous, last calls. These include both a literal middle finger to the network which cancelled a show and a somewhat cute figurative one given in another case.